January 14th

Hello! I'm...not doing to well. I'm really stressed out right now, I haven't slept in 5 days, I'm grumpy, tired, and just really irritable! I HATE it! I mean, right now I just really need to get my feelings out. I'm so angry, but like, I just need a million hugs! Thing is, the people I want to talk to I can't, and theres no other way to get this off my chest, so here...you can read about my problems...I'm sorry I don't mean to complain or feel sorry for myself...or maybe I do? I don't know. I'm just really confused, and angry...and...*sighs* I've broken down and cried like 5 times in the past day. I just...I can't do this. I don't know how my parents or my brother is holding up...Maybe I'm just not mature enough to handle this. I don't know. If you were in my situation, would you feel the same way? Would you be able to go to school, and fake being happy every day? I'm so confused right now, don't know what to think, say, or do...I...I just feel so helpless. And you know, its the same thing I told my mom today. In situations like this, you should be getting closer to God. Instead, I'm...kind of angry. I know I shouldn't be, and I know it isn't right, but...I can't help it. I mean after all, isn't it God who lets these kind of things happen to people? Good people...? Please, tell me what you think, straighten me out, I really need help and support right now...thanks guys :)