Well first of all, the house is coming great! I can't unpack anything in my room though, because theres no where to put it :p Ah well. But the floors are in and the bathrooms are finished. Well. almost finished. Just a couple more plumbing issues to take care of. then, we have to get the gas line going to our cook top rewired, other then that, theres almost nothing left. OH! WAIT the painters have to touch ups on some of the walls, cuz some of them got banged up. Not to mention our gutter, which got smashed by a worker. Oh, and the front door, one of the side light windows was totally shattered, so we have to replace the whole front door again! WHICH is BRAND new! It's only 4 weeks old :(. * dramatically* It was so young :'(
My mom bought herself a puppy a couple days ago! it's soooo cute! :D I love him :)) His name is Snickers, and he's adorable.
I'm..I'm just depressed and angry and lost and confused. My life just isn't going that great I guess. Typical teenage line: I feel like no one understands me. And, it's true. Well, at least I want to make myself believe it is..Lately, I've been writing a lot of songs to express the way I feel, but, I don't show them to anybody because..I'm nervous? Afraid of what they'll say? Yup! But, I would like to share one of them with you :)
My Miracle
The tears began on Monday night
I walked through the door of daddys room, oh what a sight
His eyes slowly opened, "Who are you" his voice began
I swallowed hard trying to keep back the tears
I dropped my bag and went to his bed
I opened my mouth and slowly said
"Daddy its me, your little girl"
it hurt so much to see him this way
I held his hand and whispered "I missed you a lot today"
He looked me, the tears in his eyes
"I hope you know I love you very much.."
After a pause he quietly said
"Baby girl, I'm almost there, I can see Gods face"
I sat down and brushed away a curl, I talked to him about my day and such..
He closed his eyes and drifted away
I lifted my face and started to pray
"Daddy don't leave me,
Please don't go,
We still need you, can't you see?"
I let him go, I walked away
I laid down in bed that night hoping for a miracle.
i went to school next day, I could hardly concentrate
Friends crowded 'round, handed me a card and said " Sorry this is so late"
I pushed through the rest of the day eager to get away
I walked into my house, mom rushed to me, she looked as if her heart were broke
"Honey, dear, daddys had a stroke, I don't believe he'll ever wake again
He can hear you, please go and talk to him"
I went in his room, looked at the floor,
I held his hand and said "I love you" once more.
I leaned over, gave him a kiss,
and thought of all the things he'd miss.
Dad I'll miss your smile, your warm embrace
I'll miss those twinkling eyes that shined like the stars above
But most of all, I'll miss the expressions of your love
Daddy don't leave me,
please don't go,
We still need you, can't you see?
I let him go, I walked away
I laid down in bed that night begging for a miracle
Wednesday morning I went to school
I got a call, i walked outside
I took a breath just to say "hello"
"Baby its me, your daddys gone
Don't worry now, I'll take care of you and John"
..I let him go, I walked away,
I prayed for a miracle, and now I know
Even though he had to go
He was my miracle.. everyday
