Thursday, January 14, 2010
January 14th
Hello! I'm...not doing to well. I'm really stressed out right now, I haven't slept in 5 days, I'm grumpy, tired, and just really irritable! I HATE it! I mean, right now I just really need to get my feelings out. I'm so angry, but like, I just need a million hugs! Thing is, the people I want to talk to I can't, and theres no other way to get this off my chest, so here...you can read about my problems...I'm sorry I don't mean to complain or feel sorry for myself...or maybe I do? I don't know. I'm just really confused, and angry...and...*sighs* I've broken down and cried like 5 times in the past day. I just...I can't do this. I don't know how my parents or my brother is holding up...Maybe I'm just not mature enough to handle this. I don't know. If you were in my situation, would you feel the same way? Would you be able to go to school, and fake being happy every day? I'm so confused right now, don't know what to think, say, or do...I...I just feel so helpless. And you know, its the same thing I told my mom today. In situations like this, you should be getting closer to God. Instead, I'm...kind of angry. I know I shouldn't be, and I know it isn't right, but...I can't help it. I mean after all, isn't it God who lets these kind of things happen to people? Good people...? Please, tell me what you think, straighten me out, I really need help and support right now...thanks guys :)
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Don't worry. You'll make it through this. I'm here for you. :)
ReplyDeleteLilly, no one is a good person. You're probably familiar with the verse Romans 3:10: "As it is written: there is none righteous, no, not one." Technically everyone deserves the bad things that come to them. But when we are in Christ, bad things are not to hurt us, but to teach us and help us grow.
ReplyDeleteYou don't realize how much closer to God you get until the trial is finally over with. I truly do know how you feel right now. Sometimes it seems like God doesn't love us anymore. Go to His Word - there is more comfort there than you could ever possibly imagine, my dear friend.
I know how much stress and confusion you must be going through. You can do this in Christ who strengthens you. He is our rock, our comfort in our time of need, and He will not abandon you.
Don't lose hope in Him. He's the only Person Who can ever help you with anything. He's going to bring you and your family out of this one way or another.
Don't forget the things He has done for you, either. I find it easy to focus on the things He hasn't done for me, but when I remember what He did for me on the Cross and the redemption I have there, my burden is lightened, even if only a little.
I hope these words bring a little reassurance to you. I know they might sound meaningless. Sometimes, they're just not enough.
We'll always try to be there for you, Lilly. We may not always physically be there when you need us, but we'll always love you. Whenever you need us, ask. And I mean that. We will always be ready to serve.
May God's peace be on you and your family.